Sunday, December 25, 2011

My wedding ring

My wedding ring has been through a lot.  I have an engagement ring that sits in one of those "enhancers," which is really two bands saudered together.  The first time it broke was about two months after we married.  I must admit, it seemed a little ominous at the time.  The sauder holding the bands together broke.  I had just washed my hands and was in the cafeteria before our daily morning assembly.  I pulled the set off to try and dry underneath and the top band just snapped off.  I took it into the jewelry store where we bought it.  They sent off the bands, then when it came back the bands were too close together for the engagement ring to sit in between.  So, they sent the whole set and told me to always send it as a set for future repairs.

A few months later, I noticed a diamond had disappeared from the corner of the engagement ring.  Not a big one, but part of the "halo" around one of the big ones.  They said the set would be gone up to a month and gave me a "promise date" to expect it back.  It was around this time that my in-laws and I confronted my husband and he went to detox.  It seemed more than a little ominous and became like a metaphor.  "Hey, turns out that this ain't perfect.  Something wasn't as secure as you thought.  You expected more endurance than the ring could give you."  So, I was thinking I would send it off for repair and it would come back good as new.  Boy, was I mistaken.

When I called on the "promise date" I had a hard time getting any information about it.  I received a call a few days later from a manager.  Turned out they lost it.  Completely lost it.  Gone.  They ended up replacing the entire set with one just like it.  They even threw in a $100 gift card.  That did not happen with my husband, though.  Nobody lost him at detox.  He came back (without a gift card, mind you).

Now as I sit here almost a year later, with another diamond missing, I realize that the battle was certainly not over.  Addiction isn't cured by "getting clean."  It's like setting a broken bone.  There's still a lot of healing that must take place.  I'm kind of afraid to send my ring off again.  I don't want it to disappear.  I also don't want to start any rumors while my husband and I are separated.  So, even though it's kind of ghetto looking - it's my wedding ring.  What difference does it make that it's missing a diamond?  Was my expectation reasonable that it would never need repair?  Or could I expect that one repair would fix it for good?  Does it hurt anything to miss a diamond for a while?  Or am I just worried about what it looks like to other people?

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